I had a moment of doubt yesterday.
I admit that I thought God had given up on us. It seemed as if Annadelle's condition was only continuing to get worse and worse, that the thousands of prayers that have been going up for her were unheard.
Throughout the day, my anxiety and worry hit a high and I definitely had a breakdown. I cried and cried when Dr. Sanchez fully explained to us why he is so concerned about Annadelle's chest rise. I was apparently confused about what he had been trying to tell me, and that is that it isn't necessarily the lung infection that is affecting her ability to breathe, but the transverse myelitis itself. She is breathing almost completely from her diaphragm because the muscles surrounding her lungs are so weak. He said even when we were released to go to the floor a few weeks back this was the case, but her doctors were hoping the lack of chest rise would resolve. It didn't, so when she got the cold, it went downhill from there.
Dr. Maertens came by yesterday while Dr. Sanchez was here to check on Annadelle's progress. He seemed pleased that she is using her left hand more and she is still able to move her left leg a bit. He wanted to go ahead and do another round of IVIG to see if it would help her chest rise. He said he did not think it could hurt at this point, as we have been here almost a month and need to see some substantial improvement pretty quickly if we are going to see a full recovery.
Chris and I asked Dr. Sanchez to contact the TM clinic at UAB and speak to the doctors there regarding Annadelle's condition. He did so, speaking to Dr. Ness at Children's Hospital who is considered an expert on TM. She has treated numerous patients with the disease and I have heard nothing but great things about her from the countless people that have messaged me whose children suffered from TM and were treated by Dr. Ness. Dr. Sanchez sent all of Annadelle's scans (MRIs and XRAYs) to Dr. Ness for her to review and give her opinion. He told us he would come by after rounds and talk to us extensively about his conversation with her, so we are just waiting (not so patiently) to hear what she had to say.
At the end of the day yesterday, Annadelle's tube had to be adjusted because it had come out a few centimeters. In order to adjust it and retape, they had to sedate her. Unfortunately sedation does not work very well on her and they had to give her a lot of medicine to put her to sleep. They also gave her a paralytic (rocuronium) and even then she woke up, so they had to give her a second dose. They were able to adjust the tube while she was asleep. Dr. Sanchez also had the PICC team come in and start another IV in her right arm in order to administer another dose of IVIG, so they did that while she was asleep. She slept for a while under sedation but once she woke up, she was much happier.
I don't know if it is the lingering effects of yesterday's sedation or what, but Annadelle ended up sleeping soundly throughout the entire night. This is the first night she has slept for a long period of time under sedation. All of her stats were wonderful throughout the night and she woke up looking well-rested.
Report today shows us that her condition has improved slightly. We are a bit concerned about some pulmonary edema, but Dr. Sanchez is confident that will be resolved with increased lasiks and albumin. He said he believes she will get much better over the next few days with a different antibiotic and that the IVIG might just help her chest rise.
I had to explain all this to make my next point. Chris and I have not only been praying for our baby girl, but also for a friend of mine who was wrongfully accused of a horrendous act that I am confident he did not commit, something that could have landed him in prison for up to 25 years. He spoke with me at length about it shortly before Annadelle got sick, but explained to me that he would stay steadfast in his faith and continue to pray. He has since reached out to me with love and encouragement for our own situation. I checked my messages this morning to find he had sent me a note to let me know all charges against him had been dropped, that God had heard his prayers and granted him his desires, just as He will do with us. As long as we give our troubles to God, he will work it out.
My friend's story gives me hope that God will give us the desires of our heart, as well. Our only desire at this point is to see complete healing in our sweet girl. We know that if we continue to give God the glory and let him work to the good of those who serve him, we will see miraculous healing that only the ultimate physician can give!
Please continue to pray for Annadelle. I have faith that our prayers are working.